Tame Your Relentless FOMO Before Fall’s Arrival

Have you become one of “the walking dead” due to a zombie diet that fills your belly with FOMO? Does the 24/7 online world of viral videos, over-hashtagged tweets, filtered photos, and animated GIFs galore make you yearn for a simpler time? Me, I’m an analog soul doing her best to tread the digital waters without getting a neurological cramp.

Daily, and almost incessantly, our collective attention is diverted and whipped into a frothy blend of neurotic nonsense. Sadly, we think we’re not swimming in the social-media pool as often as we should. (And of course, you know you should wait one hour before wading back in…)

This psychological behavior has grown mainstream enough to merit its own label and acronym: fear of missing out (better known as FOMO).

Suggestions for battling FOMO are plentiful online. I’m not reinventing the FOMO wheel; I’m merely rotating and balancing it for you:

“So much time and so little to do. Wait a minute. Strike that. Reverse it. Thank you.“

How Does Fear of Missing Out Start? Funny You Should Ask…: It all begins with a friend’s Facebook photo or tweet on Twitter that goes viral and burns as brightly as a sulfur-infused lab experiment.

If your friend can elicit an abundance of online love (and likes, and re-tweets, and…) from one dang post, you know you’re itching to outdo that effort.

It’s kind of like “keeping up with the Joneses,” but it doesn’t involve expensive cars, McMansions, or yachts…

For years now, social media has brought us immediacy and interconnection. But it also seems to trigger irrational worry that we’re missing out on something better than what we’re doing at any particular moment.

Combine that with how we deliberately choose to present ourselves and our (perfect, serendipitous) lives on social media, and BAM: Fear of missing out becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy.

This article by Dr. John Grohol, founder of PsychCentral, is the best few minutes you’ll spend reading to understand your ranking on the FOMO spectrum.

Consider Installing an Internet Blocker on Your Computer and/or Mobile Phone: Many of us use social media for business purposes, necessitating ongoing Internet access. I’m not suggesting you immediately go cold turkey. This could add undue stress to your psyche while you wonder all day what the (f-bomb) is happening on Facebook or Instagram.

What I’m suggesting is this: Check out the available Internet blockers geared toward business use. Invest in one that has the time allowance feature/option, which most of them do. This way, you can enter and exit the various social-media platforms you use for business without schussing down the time-swallowing Matterhorn.

Schedule your selected app or software to knock you off from Facebook (or YouTube, or Instagram, or…) at a time of your choosing.

Options available to you (or your IT department) include the aforementioned Cold Turkey as well as Freedom, Anti-Social, and LeechBlock (this one is a Firefox add-on).

If Being Distracted Is a Turn-Off, Then Turn Off All Push Notifications: This sensible advice applies to both your desktop/laptop device as well as your preferred “smarty-pants” mobile device. I’m not talking about silencing your computer or smartphone–I’m talking The Full Monty.

Re-familiarize yourself with the “Settings” options for all of your social-media accounts. Untether yourself from the e-mails and pings notifying you that someone just liked you, followed you, shared your post/cute-kitty photo/selfie/Periscope video, re-tweeted you, “one-plussed” you, and so on.

Here are tips for circumventing pushiness from your iPhone or Android. This fantastic Lifehack.org article will lengthen your 21st-century attention span…

Unlike Motel 6’s somewhat misleading claim, each platform will “leave the light on” for you regarding your account’s activity. They will (always) be there to devour whole hours of your time!

Assess Your True FOMO with This Handy Quiz: I found the Fear of Missing Out Quiz during one extensive Google search, but I do need to give a hat-tip to Lifehack.org for providing the link. You’ll love the name of the quiz’s URL–it’s ratemyfomo.com.

Self-assessment of your FOMO intensity won’t take long–three minutes did it for me. The more honest you are when answering the questions, the more accurate your results will be. So that you know: My FOMO level is “LOW,” and roughly two-thirds of people experience fear of missing out more than I do. Phew!

When All Else Fails, Go Old School–Go Set a…Timer: Consider this a By All Writes “life hack.” It wasn’t stolen from this Lifehack.org article targeting parental concern of kids’ and teens’ out-of-control FOMO ways.

Whether you work from home or in a commercial office, identify a timer appropriate for your business venue. Me, I prefer the standard kitchen timer my son once confiscated for a school project.

(Sure, you could also download an app on your smartphone or install a timer on your computer. These slightly outdated suggestions from Lifehacker.com are Windows based.)

I set the timer right before I plunge into my social-media repertoire. When the timer announces its clarion call, I retreat and unplug myself from my digital life. I then switch my attention to client projects or a real-time, physical human being (i.e., not an avatar).

When the Urge To Splurge on Social Media Rises Up, Mindfully Redirect Yourself: I’m not a licensed psychologist or mental-health therapist. However, I am a reconstituted “Type A” overachiever. My analytical mind has a weakness for ruminating “what if” scenarios like a marathoner.

Yes, I understand how concern for the “hypotheticals” in your life can overrule your ability to remain calm and focus on what is necessary.

When the psychological fear of not participating in that perfect, blazing-hot digital conversation or trend (at the online moment of Zen) nabs you by the scruff, fight back with mindful redirection. Methods for your consideration include:

Do self-guided meditation at your desk (or on the floor if you’re a home-based professional).

Take a brief (10 to 20 minutes) cardio break at lunchtime and incorporate walking meditation into your routine.

Use yoga-style breathing exercises to slow down your pulse and rechannel frenetic thoughts.

Remove yourself from your prime source of digital stimulation and write (by hand) in a journal.

Remove yourself from your prime source of digital stimulation and read a (printed) book or magazine or newspaper.

(Ensure that the mobile device with which you have a symbiotic relationship isn’t anywhere near you whilst attempting to reduce FOMO…)

Other Ways to Wean Yourself from Digital Activities Feeding Your FOMO:

Reduce your number of connections and friends on the social-media platforms that create the most psychological discomfort for you. Could one such candidate be…Facebook?!?

If posts from certain friends tend to set you off and create anxiety, begin filtering those peeps from your social-media feeds or hiding their posts/online activity.

Don’t compete with friends via one-upmanship posts and status updates regarding your amazing job, business, spouse/significant other, children, family, pet, house, vacation, or LIFE.

Go out of your way to interact with the people you care about in ways that don’t involve a text message, a selfie, a Facebook status update, a tweet on Twitter, a Pinterest pinboard, an Instagram photo filtered to perfection, etc. Instead, be brick-and-mortar bold: Call them or meet up in person!

Prior to reading this post, were you familiar with the FOMO acronym? If so, has fear of missing out (on social media) become a noticeable challenge for you or someone you work with? How do you cope with the overabundance of social stimulation available to you at any time?

Have you ever resorted to closing or deleting a social-media account as a way of reclaiming (partial) sanity and introducing tranquility back into your life?

If you’d rather discuss FOMO the old-fashioned way, go ahead and call me. I’ll leave you with a hashtag I intend to experiment with online–#NOMOFOMO.

Lori Shapiro is the owner of By All Writes LLC, a business-to-business (B2B) writing, editing, and research company in Marlton, New Jersey. She revels in shielding her clients from the pain of writing their own print or web marketing and educational copy. Please call Lori Shapiro at 856-810-9764 or e-mail By All Writes LLC at lori@byallwrites.biz  for a no-obligation project quote today!